DISCLAIMER: Our lawyers are making us say that we had a good time in Cannes (even though we didn’t) and that we are only doing this to make it easier for us to win the NAA again (which we’re not). Our sincere apologies to the National Advertising Awards, TripAdvisor.com™, and France Tourism®

The National Advertising Awards are awesome. If you like prizes that suck. You waste all your time trying to come up with the "best ad in Canada" just to win a trip to the worst place in the south of France? Il fait NO WAY!

A writer, an art director and a producer from an L.A. music house walk into a bar in Cannes. The bartender says what'll you have? The writer says, "hopefully not crabs." And the producer says, "too late." See, Cannes is a joke and you're the punch line. But unlike most jokes there's nobody laughing at the end, except maybe the pharmacist you tried to buy one of those nut combs from. The guy who as it turns out wasn't a pharmacist at all, just a photographer from a Dutch ad magazine. And the reason you realized this was because you got junk mail from him, which literally was a picture of your junk as mail.

And if you think going to Cannes will make you a better creative person, just take a look through this website. It was written and art directed by two people who went last year. So clearly, Cannes sucks.